It’s kind of like having the flu all of the time

The usual extreme fatigue, nausea, and bit of dizziness have made their presence known. Mood swings made a few surprise guest appearances as well. The last time I checked, working on statistics homework doesn’t normally make people want to cry. An acute episode of confusion visited one afternoon as well, where I had absolutely no idea where I was on campus. I exited the same building that I leave after a class twice a week, and have been for the past two and a half months having no idea where on Earth I was.

It felt like a scene out of a movie almost in slow motion, and after standing there in a foggy daze of looking back and forth and checking my phone to see if I went somewhere for an appointment, etc., I remembered where I was. Overall, nothing out of the ordinary or unexpected that won’t level off with time has happened since starting the new meds. The biggest nuisance is the need for naps in-between classes/meetings. I emphasize need, because there is no choice. Without taking the time to come back to my room and snooze there’s just no way that I’m able to stay awake because of how much the meds knock me out. Even keeping my eyes open while walking and riding my bike has been difficult at times over the past week and a half. If I’m walking with friends, I’ll give my eyes a little break and close them for a few moments to get some extra rest. I’m serious. Regardless of these short-term symptoms with any seizure medication, at least with those that I’ve had experience with, the immediate side effects are always the most intense. I am completely willing to give this medication a fully adjusted chance of another three or four months to see if it’s able to bring my numbers down. I’ve had a ridiculous amount of seizures this semester currently totaling up to 10 as opposed to only 4 from last semester. I have a six-week check-up with Dr. Z in another month to discuss how this medication regimen is going for me as well.

These side effects have made attending classes very, very difficult to stay awake through, but I haven’t missed a single one yet. I’ve trudged through them, coffee in hand. Some days all I think about is how much I want to be in bed sleeping, and then other days I think about how grateful I am to be sitting there and able to be taking notes with my right hand thanks to these seizure meds.

I had two seizures over the two weeks, and .5mg of a Klonopin wafer knocked them out both times, and much quicker than 250mg of Keppra had in the past. There was typically a 10-15 minute waiting period before I felt that the Keppra had a full effect on calming the seizure down, but I felt a difference within five minutes with the wafer because it dissolves into the bloodstream right away.

A week ago was the first day in 7.5 years that some form of Keppra didn’t enter my body. That’s nuts! I haven’t noticed any difference without Keppra in my system over the past week, but I figure that it’s hard to notice what symptoms are missing when new ones are being added right now. Eliminating Keppra from my list of medications means no more spells of anger when taking extra pills for breakthrough seizures, and I am definitely a fan of that.

I’ve been walking around and sipping from a giant water bottle full of ginger tea bags which helps with the nausea. I forgot what this was going to be like. It’s hard. It’s kind of like having the flu all of the time. But it’ll be worth it.

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